Developing Internal Project Partnerships

Ask most project managers what the hardest part of their job is, and you rarely hear "the schedule" or

"the budget". Push a little further, and the honest answer usually comes out: getting people who don't report to you – and who often outrank you – to treat your project as if it were theirs.

That is what an internal partnership really is. Not a stakeholder register, not a RACI chart pinned to a wall, but a working relationship with the people who hold the authority, budget, or influence your project depends on. It sounds simple. In practice, it is one of the hardest things we are asked to do.

This post draws on our recent one-day workshop, From Silo to System, where teams worked on exactly this problem. It is less a how-to and more an invitation to think – and, we hope, to disagree in the comments.

Why is partnering with power so hard?

The need looks one-sided. A partnership needs both sides to want something from it. When the other person holds the authority, it is easy for them – and for us – to believe that we need them far more than they need us. They can say no with few consequences. We often can't.

Organisations reward "my area". Most of us are measured on our own function, our own targets and our own team. Strong ownership of your area is a real strength, but it quietly trains everyone to ask "how do I improve my part?" rather than "how do we create the outcome together?"

We only show up when we need something. If the only time a senior stakeholder hears from you is when you want a decision, a resource or a signature, the relationship becomes a series of transactions. Transactions don't build trust – and without trust there is no partnership.

Challenging feels risky. With peers we push back. With people above us, we tend to take orders, because constructive challenge feels like a career risk. But someone who only takes orders is a supplier, not a partner.

"That's not my job" runs in both directions. Specialists ("I-shaped" people) protect their expertise: "I'm not trained for that", "I'll make mistakes". Senior people do the same with their time and attention. Partnership needs "T-shaped" behaviour on both sides: deep in your own area, but willing to work across others – "It's new to me, but I can try."

Trust takes time, and powerful people have the least of it. Partnerships are built through repeated interactions, not one-off meetings. The people we most need are the ones with the fullest diaries.

What a real partnership looks like

In the workshop, we used a simple five-step cycle. None of it is complicated – the difficulty is doing it consistently with people who hold more power than you.

• Understand their world. Don't open with "What do you need from us?" Start with "What are you trying to achieve?" Learn their priorities, pressures, customers, deadlines and how they are measured. Listen before you propose.

• Build trust through consistency. Do what you say you'll do. Keep people informed, raise issues early, and don't disappear when things get difficult. Trust = consistency + transparency + follow-through.

• Connect early and often. Create a useful rhythm of check-ins to share information, spot dependencies, test assumptions and ask "What has changed?" – not just when you need something.

• Create value together. Move from "What can we deliver?" to "What could we achieve together?" Bring ideas and options, challenge constructively, and look for outcomes where both sides win.

• Adapt and invest. A partnership changes as the business changes. Ask regularly: "Is this still working for you? What could we do differently?"

  
  

Rethinking the power question

Here is the uncomfortable thought at the centre of this: authority is not the same as influence, and you can earn influence from any position. Senior stakeholders rarely lack people asking them for things. What they lack is people who understand their pressures and show up with solutions.

When you become genuinely useful to someone's goals, the relationship shifts. You stop being a request in their inbox and start being someone they want in the room.

Three practical habits make the difference:

• Map your partnerships honestly. List the four to six people your work depends on and score each relationship from 1 to 10. Don't be polite – the honest answer is more useful than the nice one.

• Be specific. "We'll talk more" isn't a plan. "20 minutes every second Tuesday, starting next week" is.

• Make decision rights explicit. A surprising amount of friction with senior people comes from nobody being clear about who decides. Agree who can open, approve and escalate before the pressure arrives.

  
  

Questions to sit with

• Think of the most senior stakeholder on your current project. How would you honestly score that partnership out of 10?

• When did you last contact them without needing something?

• Where are you taking orders when you should be offering a constructive challenge?

• What should you stop, start and continue doing to turn that relationship into a genuine partnership?

• If your project were their idea, what would they be doing differently – and what would you?

Developing partnerships with people who have authority over your work is hard precisely because it asks us to act as equals in relationships that aren't equal on paper. But the shift from "my area" to "our outcome" starts with one conversation, held consistently, with someone who matters to your project.

We'd love to hear your experience. What has helped you build a real partnership with someone senior to you – and what got in the way? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Loncom True Vision runs the From Silo to System workshop for teams who want to work across functions as one connected system. To bring it to your organisation, email info@loncomtv.com.