How to Coach the UnCoachable - Transform Resistance into Growth in the Age of AI

Every leader, mentor, or manager eventually encounters a challenge with the question ‘How do you coach someone who appears resistant to change, feedback, or development? Often labelled as “uncoachable,” these individuals are not necessarily unwilling; they haven’t connected with the right approach. In today’s workplace, AI-powered tools are revolutionising coaching strategies, enabling personalised growth paths and revealing hidden potential, even in the most resistant team members.

Here are some thoughts and steps that are powerful in dealing with this scenario, and let's embrace the world of AI to empower what we do and how we deliver results:

1. Diagnose the Resistance with Data and Empathy. Resistance often masks deeper issues:

   • Fear of change

   • Previous negative experiences with feedback

   • Misaligned expectations or unclear goals

Tools like sentiment analysis in employee feedback platforms can help leaders identify communication friction points. AI can surface patterns that reveal whether resistance is emotional, structural, or skills-based and allow the leaders of our world to tailor their approach.

• Build Trust as the Foundation. No AI tool can replace human trust. Coaching succeeds when employees feel respected, heard, and understood. Here are some tried and trusted ways to establish trust:

  • Start with strength-based recognition before improvement conversations

  • Be consistent and transparent in feedback delivery

Use AI-powered performance dashboards not as surveillance, but as collaborative growth tools.

3.    Ask, Don’t Tell and supported by AI Insights. The uncoachable often resist direct instruction. Instead, shift to a question-led approach. Some example prompts that we might like to work with are:

• “What do you think is blocking progress?”

• “If nothing changed, what would the impact be?”

Tools like AI-powered coaching assistants (e.g., ReclaimAI or CoachHub) can suggest customised, context-driven coaching questions based on performance trends and communication styles.

4. Create Small, Measurable Wins as progress is easier when it’s visible. Instead of demanding sweeping change, aim for incremental improvements. Use AI-enabled learning platforms that create micro-learning paths, allowing team members to see progress in real time, boosting confidence and engagement.

5. Recognise when to pivot; even with AI-driven insights, not every coaching effort will succeed. Leaders must identify when sustained effort is unproductive and instead concentrate on role realignment or alternative solutions. AI can assist by highlighting skills gaps and suggesting alternative roles or projects that better match the individual’s strengths.

Coaching the “uncoachable” isn’t about pushing harder; it’s about finding the right key.AI doesn’t replace the human element of leadership, but it enhances it, offering insights, personalisation, and clarity that help turn resistance into progress.

So, here is my question for you: How have you leveraged AI or data-driven insights to coach the uncoachable?